This morning on the deck with the hummingbirds flitting around and before the heat of the day set in, my boyfriend lovingly plucked a stray hair from my upper lip (midlife sure is grand, y’all) and then laughed and jokingly proclaimed, “The romance is dead!”
It got me thinking.
Romance is wonderful. Gazing longingly into someone’s eyes over dinner, taking long walks hand-in-hand, surprising each other with little gifts, the kinds of kisses that literally take your breath away. All these things are part of getting to know someone and if you’re careful with your lover, they will continue to be part of your relationship for years to come.
And as the time passes, and you get to know each other better, something even more amazing than romance shows up. True intimacy.
This is the part where you absent-mindedly scratch his back while you watch Star Trek re-runs. It’s the part where his hand always finds yours as you walk down the street. It’s the part where you bring him his coffee exactly how he likes it. And yes, it’s the part where he plucks your stray lip hairs.
It’s the intimacy that makes the romance even better. It’s the deeper phase of the relationship where you’ve figured out that you actually like doing absolutely nothing with this person. It’s the part where you sit on the couch, your legs draped over his, as you both read or listen to music. It’s the part where you know you have not only a lover but a true companion.
To me, intimacy is the best kind of romance there is.