Our dining room window and balcony overlook a very busy roundabout in our neighborhood. The amount of sheer stupidity we see going on out there boggles my mind and honestly scares the living hell outta me. I’d love to continue blaming the Covid isolations of 2020 on this behavior, but I think we’re way past that at this point. We see all of humanity from our balcony every single day – some good but most terrifying.

Maniacs

Maniacs do not stop for pedestrians in crosswalks. They are too busy looking into the roundabout itself to figure out if they can continue driving around it at 45 miles per hour (in a 20 mile per hour zone). They never signal, and they never slow down. They’d just as soon kill you because they are the center of the universe.

Hesitaters

Hesitaters sit in the middle of the pedestrian crosswalks letting neither pedestrians cross nor anyone behind them in a vehicle move into the roundabout. They always, ALWAYS stop to let other drivers enter the roundabout, thus causing near misses every single day. These are the people who inevitably get honked at and then look around like, “whaaaat?”

Peduhstrians

Peduhstrians are the walkers who don’t believe in crosswalks. They walk IN the street. They cross THROUGH the roundabout because “it’s faster.” They are oblivious to the fact that as they do this, they are quite literally risking their lives. They are the parents who don’t hold their children’s hands and let them run wildly ahead toward the street. I am convinced that one day, a maniac will take out a peduhstrian – or their offspring – right in front of my eyeballs.

Maniacs, hesitaters, and peduhstrians are the worst of what we see, but we also see people who actually obey the speed limit, stop for pedestrians, cross on foot at the appropriate crosswalks, and know how to actually use a roundabout. It is DOUBLY scary to BE these people because you know that some idiot is going to do something idiotic.

Last night we were walking to dinner and the driver leaving the roundabout stopped and waited for us to cross. The Maniac headed INTO the roundabout didn’t even see us. WE were literally in the middle of the damn crosswalk. She had headphones on and was looking so far ahead of us, she just flew right by. If we hadn’t been paying attention, she would have run us down.

I also can’t tell you how many times someone has pulled right out in front of us when we’re driving through the roundabout, blinker blazing! They just go, we almost hit them, we blare our horns, and we cuss. I used to drive all the way around the building to avoid the roundabout, but that got old. I consider myself roundabout pro now, so if you’re out doing the stupid stuff, you’re gonna get the horn – and probably the finger too.

The cops in this town could make a killing monitoring this damn roundabout, I’m telling you. It’s nuts.

What I’ve learned, though (besides to always signal), is that this freaking roundabout is the perfect metaphor for life. We’re all going around, and some of us are maniacs, and some of us hesitate, and some of us are duh’ing our way through. We are sometimes oblivious, and sometimes ignorant, and sometimes we sail smoothly. We’re human. The best of what we see out there is people looking out for other people, knowing that some rules are for our own good and safety. And when that happens, my faith in us humans is restored.

All that – just from my neighborhood roundabout.