I knew I hadn’t written in a long time, but coming to my blog and seeing the last time I wrote anything was right after my daughter’s wedding almost a year ago kind of shocks me. It also tells me that I’ve felt like writing about the shit that’s gone on in that time is depressing or private – or that maybe I’m trying to protect people or something. And I hate that because for me, writing is cathartic and helpful, and I believe my writing can help others too.

What has happened since last March is crazy and has felt like one blow after another after another. It’s been a lot. I want to write about it. I want to honor the people I’ve lost and share my feelings about getting pummeled again and again. But as I sit here and think about it all, I don’t even know where to start.

So I will just write.

I will tell you that not only did we lose the world’s best dog last January, we also lost my mother, my mother-in-law, and my step-son’s mother. My daughter was diagnosed with an inoperable, incurable brain tumor.

I have things I want to write about all of these losses – they’re in here and have been knocking on my heart for a year. I will get there.

This is my first step back.