Seeing the faces of those TEN-YEAR-OLDS and their beautiful teachers continues to gut me.

My daughter works at an elementary school. My fiancé is in and out of local schools all day every day. I work in our schools on a regular basis. This is real shit for us.

You better believe that every time I walk into a classroom as a substitute teacher, I check for the safest place to send the kids if someone starts shooting. I make sure the blinds and door locks are fully operational. I keep my phone in my pocket. I look at their faces and know I might have to make decisions that could affect all of our lives.

Active shooter drills scare the shit out of kids, but they are a sad fact of life for us now. My daughter ended up in tears after one in high school. Her teacher told her she would be dead if she didn’t move faster.

Let that sink in for a minute. That’s some fucked up shit.

She wants to be an elementary school librarian, and after this week’s national nightmare, she is seriously reconsidering it – which will be a huge loss to hundreds of children because she is amazing with them.

I don’t think educators should have to carry weapons to work. I don’t think children should have to forgo recess or pass through metal detectors or be heavily guarded or play behind barbed wire concrete walls. Schools aren’t prisons.

I don’t think any civilian needs an AR-15 style weapon. School resource officers don’t carry AR-15 style guns – at least not where I live.

Sigh.

I know what I write won’t change anyone’s mind. We’re too far gone and divided as a nation for that. I really don’t want to debate or argue. I’m just hurting, and I write when I hurt.

May we all remember that we are human beings and that life is short and precious. Hug your people and be sure they know you love them. ❤️