How do you apologize if you’ve completely screwed up? Honestly, you may have done the kind of damage that is irrevocable. You may have done something that hurt someone so badly there’s nothing that will take away their pain.

But the old adage “actions speak louder than words” means something where apologies are concerned, and if you aim to be truly sorry and remorseful, actions count. A verbal apology is only part of it.

If you continue to do the same exact thing that hurt someone, your apology doesn’t mean a whole hell of a lot. True remorse comes with making corrections. It comes with taking a look at what you did that was hurtful and making changes in your behavior. It means taking a good long look at yourself and oftentimes, cleaning up your act. 

It ain’t easy. Self-examination takes guts. It takes being able to call yourself out on your own bullshit. It takes a willingness to correct it. It might take the help of family, friends, or professionals. 

It’s WORK. It’s HARD. It HURTS.

If you do it, though, it’s worth it, and here’s why. You will see that you’re just a human being who screwed up. Someone capable of growth and change and learning. You will evolve into a better version of yourself. You might even eventually amaze yourself.

You will take the steps to apologize to someone else, and in the process, you will learn to forgive yourself. And while your apology may not be accepted by someone else, you will most definitely be able to accept yourself.

I think that’s worth something, don’t you?