Turning 50 was a quiet big deal for me. Quiet in that I didn’t celebrate in any elaborate way, and big in that it’s brought with it a half century of growth, realization, and humility. I recently read a list about 50 things a woman over 50 should have, and I thought I’d write my own. These are material, mental, emotional, and spiritual items. Some of them I’ve achieved; some I’m still working on. My list is both different from and similar to the list I read. It’s a list specific to me, and I’d love to hear what others would add or subtract. This list will be “in progress” for me for the rest of my life. Without further ado, I present my 50 must-haves for this woman over 50.

  1. a killer outfit in which you feel sexy and confident
  2. a beautiful set of matching lingerie
  3. a flattering pair of jeans
  4. a meal you can cook from start to finish that is consistently good
  5. a skincare routine that makes you glow
  6. a dental routine that includes floss, dental visits, and cleanings
  7. a consistent working relationship with your doctor
  8. a personal statement that you revisit and tweak each year
  9. the ability to support yourself financially
  10. money in an account to which no one but you has access
  11. the knowledge of how to invest money
  12. a former love the thought of whom makes you smile wistfully
  13. a former love who makes you proud of how much you’ve grown
  14. a current love who curls your toes
  15. the ability to curl your love’s toes as well
  16. the ability to walk away from drama
  17. the ability to set and honor boundaries for yourself
  18. the ability to acknowledge and honor the boundaries of others
  19. the understanding that the only constant in life is change
  20. the ability to adapt to change
  21. the memory of a kiss so passionate that it has become THE kiss in your mind
  22. a valid passport
  23. a person you look up to or admire
  24. the ability to make a sincere apology and then correct your mistakes
  25. a willingness to grow, learn, and evolve
  26. a spiritual practice that nurtures your soul
  27. a physical activity you enjoy and engage in regularly
  28. at least one friend you can call at any time, for any reason
  29. a space in your home that’s just for you
  30. a will and other legal arrangements, especially if you have children
  31. a playlist that makes you happy when you’re feeling blue
  32. the ability to be alone and like it
  33. the ability to be with others and like it
  34. the ability to say no without making any excuses or offering any reasons why
  35. the ability to discuss what’s bothering you without freaking out
  36. a story from your past that is so juicy it makes you blush
  37. a story from your past so sad it still makes you cry
  38. the knowledge that you use “the good stuff” now and don’t wait for the special occasions
  39. the ability to write a heartfelt thank you note or note of condolence
  40. a piece of jewelry or furniture you have purchased for yourself just because you love it
  41. a special place you go that soothes your soul every time
  42. a hobby or pastime you enjoy and hold sacred
  43. the ability to cry your eyes out and then move on
  44. the ability to laugh until you cry – or pee yourself
  45. a heartbreak from which you will have cracks in your heart forever
  46.  a love that changed your life forever
  47. acceptance of your past
  48. acceptance of your body
  49. acceptance of your mortality
  50. the knowledge that you have no more time to waste on trivialities or bullshit because you’ve got things to do!

To be revised and continued…



2 thoughts on “50/50

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